Luci is a Sweet Transvestite
by ChangingTheCircumstances
Summary: Lucifer likes to hum sometimes to himself but that can get a bit annoying sometimes. Surprisingly, it's not Sam or Adam who snaps first.


**AN: All I can say is that I'm not sorry for this at all. I got this idea after watching Mark sing Sweet Transvestite which was hilarious and so funny! If you haven't seen it go look it up on youtube now!**

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Okay, so Hell defiantly wasn't somewhere Sam would've liked to go for vacation but it certainly wasn't how he had expected it. Sometimes it was so hot his skin should've melted off and other times it was so cold he shouldn't have been able to move. However, if anything, Hell was just annoying. Or more accurately, his roommates were annoying.

Adam wasn't to bad. They talked some when they were both in the mood but both tried to stay away from Michael and Lucifer. When they weren't arguing and trying to rip the other apart, they'd just sit and stare moodily at one another. If he wasn't in Hell or had to fear that either angel might rip him apart, Sam would've laughed because they reminded him so much of Cas and Dean when they fought.

Lucifer wasn't always with Michael though. Occasionally he'd come over to where Adam and Sam were to mess with them. It wasn't uncommon for either brother to ask Lucifer why he didn't just forgive Michael. The Devil would normally go silent in response and turn away, usually fighting with the elder angel again.

Nevertheless, one day the Devil started humming to this one song. Sam had heard it before but he couldn't place his finger on it. What could it possibly be from?

He continued to hum the same tune, over and over again, for about three months before someone finally snapped. Surprisingly, it wasn't either Winchester.

"You have been humming that nonstop for three months! Just shut up!" yelled Michael from where he sat. Adam and Sam could practically see the waves of irritation rolling off of him.

"Does my singing annoy you brother?"

"That's not singing! That's humming and yes it is annoying me!" Michael cried out.

"So would you like it if I sang it instead?" asked Lucifer with a wicked smile.

"I didn't say—" But it was already to late as the Devil began to burst out in song.

"How do you do? I see you've met my faithful handyman. He's just a little brought—"

_Wait_, thought Sam, _was Lucifer singing . . . oh but he couldn't be!_

"—down because, when you knocked he thought—"

"Lucifer you can stop now," Michael said, regretting he had ever brought this up. He did not like the mischief look in his brother's eyes.

Nevertheless, Lucifer kept singing right on time. "—you were the candyman. Don't get strung out by the way I look. Don't judge a book by it's cover."

Adam's eyes were wide as he glanced over towards Sam. "Is he singing what I think he's singing?"

Sam mutely nodded, not sure if he should laugh or scream.

"I'm not much of a man by the light of day," Lucifer continued to sing as he suddenly popped up behind Michael, causing his brother to jump. The next part, he whispered in his ear. "But by night I'm one hell of a lover."

Michael jumped away, completely shocked by how close Lucifer had come. "Okay I get it! I'll let you hum whatever song you want just—"

"I'm just a sweet transvestite, from Transexual, Transylvania!" Lucifer sang as Sam did a face palm and Adam made a gagging noise.

Lucifer continued to sing and dance, making Michael the most uncomfortable person in the entire Universe. The Devil sang the song again and again for about two hundred times until he finally stopped and even after that he still hummed the tune.

Nevertheless, Michael, Adam, and Sam quickly learned to allow Lucifer to sing whatever song he wanted to (or hum it in some cases). Still, after that, it wasn't uncommon for Lucifer to annoy Michael in a completely different way.

At one point, Sam found himself laughing out loud and was honestly surprised when he wasn't ripped to threads and instead the Devil laughed with him along with Adam. For the next few decades, the time in Hell was passed like this and even though they never said it, Sam was pretty sure that Lucifer and Michael had already forgiven each other.

Sam was laughing and smiling when he suddenly felt a hand on his shoulder and turned to see Cas.


End file.
